Our Children are Gifts: Protect them, Dr. Emdad Khan, SNMC & CBET, Ottawa, Canada
Those of us, who have children, we are very fortunate. Think of those, who try hard but cannot have children. As parents, we have to provide safe, caring and loving environment for our children.
Many of us are immigrants or children of immigrants. We have issues in our back home countries, so we migrated to Canada for better and safe lives for ourselves and our children and also to becoming contributing and peace loving Canadians.
We all need to work to earn money as fathers and mothers. Our children need money, and we also need money. Our children need money but more important, children need time from us. So if we sacrifice a bit, if either father or mother stays with the children in the evening, it is the most important gift by parents to the children.
Children need family support at home, parents also need to be actively involved in the elementary and high schools where children studies. Parents also need get involved with the community and neighbours where children are growing up. All these will make the children confident, happy and safe, will not feel isolated or get depressed.
If we look at all the young persons who are derailed, commit suicide or involved in violence or deplorable acts, root cause in most cases is the family breakdown. Whatever the reason, the kids felt lack of family support.
Let us state a case of young high school student, described to us by the canteen manager of the school. He observed the young man comes with torn shoes and dirty torn shirt & trouser weeks after weeks. The boy replied he lives in the basement with his father and step mother. They hardly talk or socialize or ear or drink with them. At the beginning of each month, his father simply slides a check of small amount under his door, not speak with him. He can hardly mange his school supplies, food and clothes with that money. So he washes his cloths once in a month and buys old clothes and shoes once in a year. This is a story will touch every one and it happens in Canada!
Next to home, children spend a lot of time in school. These days, in a school kids are diverse and come from different ethnic, cultural, linguistic and faith back ground. Each kid try to make some friends and also socialize with those friends. Unfortunately, a small percentage of kids are bully and there is a fair chance our nice quiet kids might be bullied in school. He or she may feel shy not to share with parents or even with siblings. They may not even share with class teachers. The young boy or girl may suffer inside. Gradually they lose interest in school, feel isolated and then become depressed.
Most Ottawa public school students are bullied, board survey finds. (http://www.torontosun.com/2012/10/06/controversial-school-survey-results-in)
After being bullied, being in isolation and depressed, some of the kids take drastic actions. Some take the path of self-destruction, following the path of suicide. We all know the story of Amanda Todd (https://nobullying.com/amanda-todd-story/)
We all know, the young German Iranian gunman was a depressed teen ager who was bullied in high school and then became obsessed with mass killing. He killed nine innocent youths and then killed himself. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2016_Munich_shooting).
As parents, fathers and mothers, we socialize in our own environment. Our kids also require socialization. They have the desire to be involved in sports and cultural activities. Here, we parents can help them to have a helpful, kind and compassion environment. We may invite the kids and their parents with whom our kids play and socialize. We need to get involved as parents with our kids as families in a proper environment, where we parents can enjoy and kids also gets a healthy environment to play and socialize.
We can take the kids to participate in soccer and hockey. They enjoy the games and we socialize. If we like moderate faith based environment, we have opportunities to create community organizations like SNMC (http://www.SNMC.ca ) which organizes various sports activities and fun trips for kids of different age groups. Community organizations, like SNMC, cater for spiritual, social, education and spots needs of kids, youths and adult men and women in a friendly environment.
In conclusion, we like to emphasise, as parents it is our duty to help our children to grow as young law abiding peaceful and contributing Canadians. We have to give time to our kids at our home, get involved in kids schools and be active members of the local community organizations and prevent kids from getting isolated, depressed and finally prevent being suicidal or radicalized and violent.